Recently in Funny Category

Even though he has to relocate his ficuses, Donald Trump expressed his appreciation for the fine foliage by stating, "There's no plant as beautiful as the ficus and no plant that does the trick like the ficus."

Ficus. Respect.

Their e-mail, and my response.

I hate it when people spell "spam" like "SPAM." It bothers me almost as much as "MAC" and "IPOD."

(15:55:49) Teamextreme73: Hello+Are+you+there?
Probably AIM'ed me from DDR Freak.. should have been a warning sign right there..
(15:55:49) thecrufty1 : Sorry, I ran out for a bit!
(15:56:04) Teamextreme73: hi im chaika persistant
(15:57:49) Teamextreme73: what tiome are u coming back
Obviously not seeing that I was auto-away
(15:58:26) Teamextreme73: answer u stupid idiot
16:00
(16:05:27) Teamextreme73: dfu k toy
16:05
Yeah, like I want to talk to you now..

At least that was slightly entertaining.

Museum of bad album covers: the worst album covers ever!

Thanks to GurtyGurt for this link. I guarantee that you will NOT be the same after looking at some of these album covers. For real.

After finding that "intercourse," a perfectly harmless and proper word was censored by iTunes Music Store, I went on a quest to see what else they bleeped out.

Penis? Yup. Censored. Penile is fine, though.
Vagina? Certainly censored. A particulary funny example: "The V****a Monologues"
Dick? Absolutely censored. But, not as artist name. But, if used as a name in a title or album, then yup. Funny, since Negativland has a character named "Dick Vaughn," who continually shows up as "D**k Vaughn."
Cock? For the most part. Funny example: "A C**K and a Hen," and "C**k. Aim. Shoot" as song titles. Joe Cocker isn't censored.
Labia? Nope, that's allowed to live.
Sex? Perfectly ok.
Anus? Acceptable.
Faggot? That's certainly censored.
Dyke? Yup, that too. But, only in a song title. The award for funniest and stupidest example of censorship was a song title named: "D**k Van D**e". Wow, that's a two for one there! Poor Dick. No respect.
Clit and clitorous? Censored, and censored.
Tits? Yes.
Boobs (and variations)? That's perfectly fine.

What about racial slurs?
Nigger is censored, but honkey/honky/whitey/cracker isn't. I call racial discrimination!
Kike and FOB had no matches, so I couldn't use them.

Now it's your turn, see what kind of silly, stupid, and asinine examples of censorship you can find on iTMS, or pick your own music service and try that.

Revolutionary Energetic Diversification: Dumbassedness

I called Baja Fresh today and talked to the manager guy, who was super cool. He basically said just come in and ask for him, and he'd hook us up with a free meal. So, we came in, he was really nice, and we got a free meal. Awesome. And, it was super tasty.

Leslie and I were heading to the Bellevue Square Mall to spend some gift certificates. On the way, we got stuck at a red light in a double left turn. The person in front of me wasn't fortunate enough to stop behind the cross walk. So, rather than just doing the safe and sane thing (i.e. just turning left through the red light) he decided to back up a few inches. Now, this person was partially blocking the cross walk, and partially blocking traffic trying to go through the intersection. Every few seconds he'd decide to back up a couple of inches. At one point nearly pinning a pedestrian trying to cross behind him in the cross walk between our car and his. Anyway, in a super cool twist of fate, a motorcycle cop stopped at the red light on the left part of the intersection to us. The dipshit in front of us is finally able to turn left, and to put a lid on his stupid behavior, he turns into the leftmost lane mid-turn (in the double left, we were in the right lane).

The motorcycle cop makes a U-turn and pulls the fucktard over. It was nice to finally see some retarded dipshit get what was coming to him. Ha ha. As we parked in the parking garage, we could look out and see the cop writing him a ticket. A warm, fuzzy feeling indeed.

In another note, yes, I've been lax on the updates recently. Vacations have made me lazy. Sorry.

Techdirt:Who Do You Trust, The Wiki Or The Reporter?

I was reading Techdirt, and there was an interesting commentary on a reporter's completely misinformed view that since Wikipedia isn't a credentialed resource, that suddenly it's not credible. What a load of crap. I mean, look at any textbook, likely it will be filled with errors and mistakes. However, textbooks aren't a community resource, unlike someting like Wikipedia, so good luck getting anything corrected.

The people who contribute to the service tend to know what they are talking about and when there are mistakes with entries, you better believe that they are fixed quickly. I find it funny that when Techdirt challenged the reporter to puposefully insert incorrect facts into a Wikipedia entry and see how long it took until it was fixed, it was pretty much brushed off.

I mean, sure I don't work for Konami, but does that suddenly invalidate the hours of work I've spent inserting information into Wikipedia about Bemani-related information and instantly make it all lies? According to this guy, it does.

But really, what do you trust more, a dynamic community-driven resource with an agenda of spreading reliable information that's constantly undergoing development and additions, or slow-moving corporate agenda backed information resources where it can take months for a simple typographical error to get fixed?

What do I know, though.. I'm a fan of this "dangerous" and "misleading" web resource. Of course, the reporter in the article was basing his information on heresay from a librarian, who I'm sure isn't credentialed to judge the authenticity of information in an encyclopedia. Just goes to show, having press credentials gives you the authority to blow anything out of proportion.

I was eating breakfast and watching Ricki Lake, and this girl on the show was all like, "who dat is?!", and I said, "my baby mama!"

Fucking Bemani... -_-


this post enabled by airblogging.com.

I've been slammed today, but I managed to see some amazingly bad stuff on #ddrfreak today. Here's just a sample.

This guy then went on to attempt to flame IguanaGrrl in private messages, and continued to insist that good-cool was Osamu Kubota and/or not a person.

Um, ok. I'll keep that in mind next time I say "kekeke".

This person went on to explain how they are 100% not racist at all, and how they are fat at 90 lbs and ``5'7"-5'9"''

Finally.. the gem for today:

.. no, wait, it gets better..

These randomly generated spams designed to defeat Bayesian filters seem to get more and more ridiculous. Here's one (that still ended up in my junk folder) that I got today.

Now, I'm assuming the "you" is for "your," but maybe not. I mean, making a business selling software*to* cadaver eunuchs seems like kind of a bad idea. However, you never know what kind of software you may need *for* those cadaver eunuchs that you have sitting in the freezer in the garage.

Hm. This is sounding more and more like an episode of CSI. Or, perhaps, some weird Jeffrey Dahmer fantasy.

Again, I have to wonder, why would anybody want to do business with somebody who resorts to such scummy tactics to try to advertise to you? Does anybody actually buy shit from these losers?

In my office I have the DVD for the movie Startup.com. A great documentary about the rise and fall of an Internet startup during the boom and subsequent bust of the late 1990s. While waiting for my computer to reboot, I was thumbing through its little booklet.

What falls out of the DVD case? Why, a subscription card for Yahoo! Internet Life. A great magazine that also disappeared after the Internet bust (sniff.. I even subscribed to it).

Kind of funny and sad at the same time. A movie about a fuckedcompany, with a subscription card for a fuckedmagazine.

If they knew how badly people would abuse the symbols available in Unicode, they probably wouldn't have even bothered...

My friend Andy had a link on his blog to this Taiwanese site that had scans of this book on "Useless Japanese Inventions."

I downloaded the pictures, transliterated the eyestrainingly difficult to read text, and mirrored them on my site for your enjoyment.

The amusing thing is that despite their silliness behind these inventions (and the liberal use of prosthetic limbs and bathroom implements) they are still pretty practical (for the most part).

Enjoy.

(Edit: Fixed local mirror link, sorry..)